he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
