My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
