why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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