so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize