Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
