so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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