My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
