I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
