Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
