A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
