please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
