i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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