Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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