did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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