and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
