she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
It's just like the Real World with babies
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize