You really coming over, don't trick.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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