Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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