I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
