I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
