yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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