Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
