Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Randomize
