Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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