He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize