I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Are my feet made of real feet?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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