your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Holy shit dude........stairs
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
