i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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