if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Randomize