Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Randomize
