you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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