I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Sorry my hands just texted you
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
