Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Randomize
