ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
