It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
