you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize
