I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
