Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
