Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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