You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
