thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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