i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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