dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
