walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
