if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
