Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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