You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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