dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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