There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
