Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
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